Moving on...

waa.... hit me so much so painful. i really hope i could move on asap ! your hitting me real bad, you went clubbing. you knew if you went clubbing i wouldnt even patch anymore. keep go out with boys haha ! good luck man ! i dont believe they want you for who you are... but their achievement is only one thing. SEX. lol... sad but reality... you got drunk wow... make me hate you even more... i got no idea whyy . i feel so painn ! i just hope i could move on sooo yaaaa :) i wont feel hurt anymore and could love someone else ... good luck, i will be there as a friend if you need ya, and i take all your words seriously therefore ya..

Lost hope.

After seeing you always with guys, it hurts. I lost hope.

...

It doesnt matter anymore, the fact that I am really afraid of being in a relationship, dont worry, even if chiobu jio me, I also wont accept. Cause I am really afraid of being into a relationship already. I just know, everyday, you have boys messaging you. And your not reluctant to push them away. As long as you got them, I am happy for you already :) I am sorry.. maybe after I really moved on, then I can be your friend alrightt ? Now I still have feelings, very deep feelings. Therefore... I dont wanna hurt myself everyday like now.. It hurts damn deep. I am sorry... Bye :)

10th October :)

Hey hello baby girl ! Good morning ! Well ... in our relationship.. I think its really tough yeah ? Somehow we manage to pull through :) I really just hope, love will be the reason we are still holding on ya? Really appreciate for everything you know? You always like to help.. sometimes carried away by stuff. Wanna tell you, you must really manage whats at the top first ya? I really hope ya know :) Lastly ! I love youu heheee .
Promises I said, I will keep... Today I opened " what makes a rs last is the amount of effort both people put into the relationship ! I wanna promise this time, I will not give up anymore ! lets jys !" Haha dear ! that truth :) I also promise so ! Okay? lets just jiayou tgt ! :>  well for now ! i shall say gdnightts ya ?

HopeYaDreamOfMe:) Good nights <3 Love you ! Super miss you now !

Two sided you meant?

From now on, you want my other side that treat you totally good gone right? Cause its so hard to believe right? Now I grant you, listen, I only have two sides when people becomes close to me. For instances like Johnathan, when he do something wrong, I will be the original me and scold him if I need to. Cause I dont go fight with integrity. My second side comes when I treat him different from others, the trust given to him compared to others would totally be different. And I of course would treat him better than other friends. Thats the same thing I am trying to explain. The real me is really harsh. Cause I just say whatever I should say and go with whats right. The one caring about you that you dont believe? Been always ranted by you and doesnt say a thing. Even when being hurt? You think its easy? Someone who I really love so much. Its not easy at all. Now I said whatever that is in this two side thing. Going bathe, later then reply your message.

FUCK THIS SHIT.

Is it really true that I should treat you the same like others ? I am sad because your the only one that I treat super nice but then doesnt make use of it. That make me think that I am taken as granted. I knew you still dont wanna do that little bit. We not gonna go anywhere but quarrel.

Hello baby girl ! Now you like super sad.. you thought I forgot about you but I never... After I arrived home, I cough none stop.. and after bathe.. my body super hot... :( Having fever... So had medicine first... Today super happy ! Even after you quarrel with me last night.. you still came to my house accompany me go haircut ^^ And dear remember do rest than do the grad present okay ? Cause its really time consuming ! Remember to mange your time... ! Happy with you today hehe ! Really enjoyed ya? Sorry had work so cannot accompany you dinner ! My bad ! Soon we will travel the whole Singapore okay ? <3 Love ya ! ^^

Today I opened;"Stupid time table of yours! Cannot meet up le la! Find time for me okay ? I miss you a lot !" Haha dearr ! I miss you alot alot too ! <3 Of course I will find time for you ! If the person is important to you, no matter how busy you are, you will always find him for him or her <3 :))

Goodnights,SleepTights,ILoveYou,Misses,Huggs !
                                                                                                         -Yaosiang baby boyyyy

Untold story,

Hello baby girl ! Yesterday I toh already so never update blog, this is to repaid ya okay ? I am so sorry for what happened yesterday... But theres something I wanna tell ya. From my previous relationship, no matter what happen.. I will just tend to keep it to myself. Slowly, I will gather more and more secrets keeping them to myself. Soon I explode, then I would said everything out... that is when miscommunication happens, I really hope history dont happen again. Cause by keeping to yourself its a dead end for us you understand ? I am so sorry, but if you understand ... trust take times to build.. and take seconds to destroy... so ya...

Yesterday ! I read the letter ! I opened ;"Hey, I love you. Promise me you will always be there for me? Try la even if you cant I also will !" Hehe , Its sweet. I will try as much as possible but there priority to things ya? Like if something happened of course I will try my best to be there ya ? I love you too ! Hope we really last and hope we continue to solve problems.

4th Oct ! :)

Hello Babyy Girl !
Today hehe ! Keep late reply yaa :x Cause I keep forgetting >< Forgive me okay ? :P I will try my best to replyyyy ! Hehe, and was so happy to see you today ! ^^ Wanted to give you a hug when I see you but I SO shy :x and I promise ! I will check one letter everyday :) hehe , even though I really really just wanna one time open all to see lah :P today I opened 'Hope I enjoy my birthday dinner ^^ with jodi and steve' Yeahh ! Its the first time i see you eat so much ! of course happy lah cause you plan one leaaa :) dearyy ! something random ! everyone makes mistake, me you, everyone.. so must learn to understand okay ? no matter who but they do mistakes because no ones perfect :P kay kay ? i appreciate the super letters ! SO SWEET ^^ still thinking what the graduation gift is ! :@

dear ! dont need to wake me up one ! it should be other way round ! suppose my wake you ! cause you my zhu zhu mah :x hopefully everything so smooth tomorrow okay ? I think your asleep cause your not replying ! I love youuu !
SweetestDreamOfMe:x HUGGSSyoutosleep ! LOVEEE YOUUU ! ^^

3rd :) MISSING YOU.

Hello wifeee :x ! ONE DAY you will be my wifeee :) 

Wahahahaa ! I realise this few days you keep play as my alarm ! But ya knoww ? I can wake up derhh :) I heartpain see you wake up so early just to wake meee ! >< So you rest okayyy ? ^^ Dont purposely wake up to wake meee ! I will heart pain ! Today didnt text you much cause I practical ! Glad you understand heheee . ! 

Oh yaaa . ! Maybe sometimes, like Jialing, just not to cause misunderstanding, you can just ask her or him :) in any situation just dare to ask. cause if you dont ask , you will never know ! Agree ? ^^ As long as you trust the person is speaking the truth laaa ! Anyway whole day, I super miss you! keep check phone got text message anot only during practical never check :x cook you the dessert soon kay ? its really naisee ^^ 

hmmm , ahma loves youuuu ! LOL random ! just stating fact ya ! Dont no why ... its like God want me to tell you thissss lohh ;x 

GOOD NIGHTS MY GIRLF ! WE SLEEP "EARLY" TONIGHT KAY? 

SWEETEST DREAMMM ^^ I will protect you no matter what ^^ 

A little help.

I know exactly whats happening around. Just maybe, if you think a little more positive which is impossible, I won't be influence by people cause I live the way I want to. And your the first, the ever first, to take control of me instead of me being the boss. No one ever, my friends, no one dares to even scold me, shout at me, ignore me, only you. I guess that is because you cared and you have a very very stubborn personality, and right, no one is perfect. Maybe you can try this... pull back a little, just enjoy the process of being love, dont get angry, because one your angry, I cant love you, you will think negative, thats why. Therefore, just allow me to do it, as long as your not angry, I try my best to love you. Cause when you angry, I totally got no confidence, try not to put in so much for this period. But of course, still love me larh xD Okiee ?

Iloveyou,Ihugyou,Ikissyou, Nights,Sweetdreams,Sleeptights.

                                                                                                                 -Baby boy.

1st Oct ♥♥

Yessss ! We are finally alright :D You gave us second chance, remember there won't be a third chance, cause it hardly comes. And your so fcking sweet, called my from 6:2Oam to 6:3Oam none stop ! Thanks dear :> Walao ! But delay you from preparing to school >< ! Well ! I hope you like the pooh bear :) really hope you like it ! and usually i dont write ... so ... sorry for the ugly handwriting :x I tried my best le ! Dont so worry for my coughing okay ? Its gonna get well soon :x ! and dont ever feel bad for me okay ? just do your best and dont regret ! thats all I ask for <3 :) hopefully we will last till marriage HEHE. really missing you now ! good nights , sweet dreams, muacks ! baobao :)

Dreams.

I really still want to. Those promises we made, plans...
Going USS, Halloween, Flyers, just with me, both of us. Zoo , everything ,
everything I wanna just do it with you, no one else...
I need you... really,
Only if you know, we are gonna change things once we are together again , restarting all over
again, forget everything we had in september...
How I wish. I am dying for your smile, its so far since I haveto see it. I need to work for it all over again , where its reeally a smile just full of happiness...

30th Sept.

Woah, now so complicated,
17 more minutes to 1st month, I rather not celebrate it, I would choose 1st as our date again if only its possible, only when we really change. I would choose to restart, and I would still you choose you. I dont need some girls whose already good to come in, I want someone who really needs me, make use of me.

Was really misunderstanding, you already told me its impossible that you would change the taiwan trip, you even put your stand, you said no matter what happens, you would still go with him.. then you told me he liked you and still chasing after you. Of course, the first moment I heard that I would really decide on holding or not. Cause if loyal, of course your willing to give up... THEN you gave it up really just for me. Now its my fault. Me to blame, now no matter what I do, I won't get you back. Regret yeah?

Instead waiting for miracle to happen, I will look for miracle...

Nights baby girl, stop crying, I am really sorry...

30.9.2012

Have you been drinking ? I am as worried , I keep it cause I knew if I said you might drink more. Thats what I am really afraid of. Your stubborn I dont no how to control ya know ? If only you know everything I do was for you. I wanna hear you. I wanna know. What happened recently. Dont sick please. Cause not now , at least when we are okay? I still want to be the reason you smile ya know ? I am not , dont assume , its not like when we break , I will leave you alone. I will still love you until I cannot do it anymore. Now I guess the only problem was just.. my time and not making time ? I would I always ask what you have... I look forward always , when we are both free. Then we make time..

Really go to your feelings , if you cannot take my way of managing time... then eventually we will go down... correct ?

hm.

I guess I really have to tell you everything now. Straight, the only reason, I dont like to tell you things is only because you will be angry 90% if I tell you about things , and when your angry and when I tell you , you would reply , 'whatever' , 'dont no'. How to really tell you things this way. It will only make things worse. No one would go and spoil their happy time, correct?
Whenever, you want things you know, like suddenly want things but I really couldnt afford, I would.. think, I dont have the ability to do so.. Yes , I will buy them but it would be at monthsary like I am buying something for you this 1st Oct , and when you want something , I couldnt stop it , you want means you want it. I dont no how to make you understand.
I never respect your uncle, I respect every elder, the main thing I am putting on respect is the way he handle things just now. Its no way I am giving up my respect, I never shout at people uncle than me unless they disrespect me first.
There are limits to things, its not a want then you will confirm get it, I use to think this way, is like you want this boyf then you will get ? Nope , sometimes, things will block us, if we cannot continue something , we change plans by being flexible we find other way out. -> Dont have to get a perfect boyf , get someone thinks that they are suitable for you. Like you know if you cant have steamboat today, you can have it tomorrow , if its close today , you also lanlan right?
Its my fault, I didnt fulfill my promise , cause I promised you going to house stay for the whole period and now I can only stay like weekends.. that is because there are things we cannot predict and control ya, but I promise that I would go as long as I could , cause I know even you want me to not go your house cause its very inconvient. I am not God , I cant change things, I cant make it the way I want it just because I want it. I am just a mere boy, havent even get into adult stage.
I am also so sorry , I forgot your probation , most probably the most important things , you shout by at me. Ouch, it really hurt, everytime. You may not mean it but ... I took everything seriously, I cant act as nothing happened cause its part of it , like girls, they remembered every single shit guys say to them , I really will do my part to really understand you but there are really so much things , that will disappoint you , i could remember alot of you , i cant remember all of yours because I really not superman , i aint perfect. but i would never stop trying you know.
There is things like asking before assuming , on this , its really easy , as long as we both dare to ask nothing would go wrong. yes I would like to tell you everything , only if I got the chance...
The only thing I dont like is when you angry , i cant talk to you and everything you said will hurt , thats the most main thing...
I wouldnt spoil any more ...  you know when I need to promise , I will think about it. but you came along with your puppy eyes , so cute ! and keep spam me 'please please please please ! promise me!!' next time , I will think before I promise okay ? all because I was worried you get disappointed but now your feeling even more than disappointment because of broken promises. so I know whats wrong on this.
I am feeling the same exact feeling , I would also try my best to you know spend all most time with you , but my thought are different , as long as I could spend time with you , just by your side... you know I would be really happy , even listening to your voice on the phone.. thats enough , I dont expect much .. i really hope I would spend all my other time on you but there are things that are also important . but just all this is making it worth it and really just on you . its worth my time.
thanks , i know that you appreciate stuff i do . but do you know by buying stuff , all this it takes effort , they dont come easily , i plan stuff , i plan where to go , buy what food for you. even when I dont have enough money , juust to make you happy , I wouldnt want to take my meals , just because its that worth it.
my family has always been on finiacial problem , if i just stop working , i would never really afford my own stuff you know... and its really important for me... once i stopped i would have problem ... but the thing is ... i still have dreams , i want to make them come true.
its me , i dont really change for people , we are the same from the start, that part of me is still there, but we have to always fight the thing infront of us before going back there , it will naturally come.
just like any love song . they have meanings behind every song. its time , we really need to talk about , and there must be things we need to accept you know.. it doesnt come with perfect , its a relationship you fight together then you will earn it. and treat it the most important thing ever.

APPRECIATED !

Hey baby girl ! You know my birthday just ended , and you know from start all the way , from monday ! you met me when you dont even want to , when you ended up sad going home .. and even came back second day just for me ! I really do appreciate . those shirts ! are nice ! they are from your heart ! and most specially its about the cake ! i finished the cake this morning . haha ! its very tall you know ? now arguing with you ... really have to make a decision ... its about you . i dont regret to things i do , yes i do it my way , i dont change and as long its integrity. anyway. the cake was from your heart , totally agreed with cousin . and lastly you even planned buffet with me on actual day on my birthday ! <3 really appreciate it , even though , you were angry with things and stuff , but I love you thats all i really know , when you love someone its really like the apple of my eyes , you just wanna see them happy , thats all...


NO , I NEVER WAS LYING , I WAS ADMIRING THE WAY YOUR UNCLE DO THINGS , I RESPECT, I TOLD YOU I WAS DIFFERENT FROM OTHER GUYS. HE HAS HIS STAND , HE CARED FOR AHMA.
I am really different from other guy , I ain't that person who you really look for , but , I can be the person you really love . When time comes it will make sense , people cherish after that lost , and only think ..

28sept , happybirthday yaosiang :)

Hey ! Baby girl , i know time is getting lesser , its because whatever johnathan said was correct. if there even money , its impossible this relationship would carry on ... now your quarreling , very angry ... but I am super hurt , i dont no how long i can hang on ... but ... i dont no ... sometimes , i am not really superman you know ? I fail ... really . Im sorry ... i couldnt be perfect , maybe there is more perfect boys , jsut just want you to know i keeps trying everytime , i just dont want you to climb over me ... i try to change that .. might lose you but I will try as long as there is hope...

and i just wanna say thanks for everything , the birthday , you even pon school just for my birthday ... dont no what to say , wordless ... i know you really do love me .. you know .. i really appreciate everything you did for me .

wtf can i do.

NIGHTS ♥

Hey ! :) Nights baby girl ! I love you and I fucking miss you leyyy . I know you knoww too right :P But finally tomorrow can see you already ! Ah like after three LONG days :( Sweet dreams :) SEE YOU TOMORROWW ! MUACKS , loves hugssss ! ^^

Just continuing believing , everything will go out smooth , if you dont like yourself , then change. Cause you only changes only for your own not for others okay ? Hahaaa yeaaa . ^^

SILLY GIRL.

Hey , I know , its been really tough on you. Doing so much in a just started relationship is really something. I know , I just wanna let you know I super appreciate what your doing. And I never take it for granted. All this are words of affirmation. I know you always go think negative if I ain't trying, but I am finding another way to let you not think too much, now not gonna ask you to put every trust and hope , time will let you understand how much I really care for you and how much I am taking this relationship seriously. You been through a lot of relationship, therefore you might think it will never last but I tell you , I will never give up on this relationship, I will take whatever, even when your not mine. All I hope is your dont hurt yourself okay ? And try share stuff with me :) Appreciate whats around you :) We really been through a lot yea ? In just a short time , mountains keep coming , when your tired , dont give up , just climb on me and I will piggy back you all the way. For the money , now I cant promise nice treats but in the future of course :) We live our own lifeee ! Hehe . Try to make sure you control my money okay ? :P I also spendthrift when money goes out , I dont care :P I JUST KNOW ITS WORTH THE THINGGG , CAUSE ITS YOU I LOVEEEE !

HAPPY WITH YOU FOREVERRRR ! <3

Good Nights Baby Girl :)

Hey baby girl ! So sorry , its been a few nights since we had night talks ! :( And its all my fault ! :/ Tomorrow die die must talk okay ? thought I have work the next day. Just gonna say , good and best of all luck for your exams ! Gonna post something later , about ya... yesterday you know ? I TREASURE ALL THIS DAYS WITH YOUUUU . Hugs , kisses , sweet dreams <3

Go sleep ! Tomorrow exam ! JIAYOU ! HAHA . HUGS AND KISSES .

Something its easy , so dont complicate it .

Yeahh , I dont care how you gonna think , or whatever , I know as long as a person is willing to try , he or she can do it. You may think I deserve something better , but everyone could be that better. Will always be proud of it. Dont ever blame cause its just avoiding. Yes true . Money cant buy happiness but it can buy you a something more comfortable. I just wanna say , I am happy that I spent my money all on our ddates as long as I could see your smile but I also have better plans , I also wanna see your future smile , thats why . You hate thinking , but try thinking positively. For what you reall need . Do give it a try.

GOOD NIGHT :)

Hello baby girl ! Hope you have fun today ! Hehe , I promise , once I get out of my own mess , we gonna always have fun :) Promise , you gonna be there yaaa ? Just hope you always keep that smile there , when theres problem always tell me , I dont want be the last one to know :( kay ? I love you , good nights ! SWEET DREAM YO . Hugs and kisses :)

Hello love !

Hey baby girl ! Good nights ! your having your sweet dreams now ! Gonna see you tomorrow morning !  Cant wait to see you :)

thanks for sharing your past with me today ! I really dont mind infact , I am happy that you shared so much cause this means you trusted me . i cant be someone like your ex but I will love you in my own ways haha :P , instead of doing this , I will do it in another way :P haha i love you ! loveee youuu ! tell me more things kayss ?

Hey baby girl :)

Happy two weeks ^^

dont no why this relationship so special , so fast we could went through so much . could last cause we love each other and truely cares despite the not enough understand of each other. really thank you <3  for all your love.

today met you in the morning :) super happy ! then send you home , after that you slept ! my pig hehe . your having so much thought , poor thinggyy :( just rmb I am there for ya okay ? smile always cause its the most prettiest thing i ever seen .and you tried waiting for me while you want me to enjoy with my bro , thanks love you , dont wanna wake you up . dont silly kay ? i also can text with you while with them luhh . love youu :)
jiayou with the things your fighting , ask me for advice or if you wanna rant at :) i would eventually let you hit me to let your anger out kay ? HEHE . love you HAPPY WITH YOU . NIGHTS SLEEP TIGHTS !

Sand bag :) Here I come.

The past is the reason I should love more.

Can we solve this understanding ?

You told me about trust , I never stopped trusting.

You promised to trust.

ALL words are REAL. I SWEAR. FROM THE START.

Avoiding ain't a choice.

But why ?

Promise to solve when theres problem.

Worried, at least your homed.

I never once lied , unless you know I am joking.

It will make you even hurt.

I wont let you go hungry.

When I heard you vomit , I was so....

You seem like you given up ... :(

Cause there always been trust..

I want to call you ... but I am crying ?

Did you eat your medicine ??

Whats the point ..

FUCK MY LIFE.

I will just cry for a few nights and I think I will be alright. Pillow will be there for me.

I didnt lied at all , I already told the truth. I distanced myself from all girls.

God , where is the promises you made ?

So worried ... No mood. 

Just go and remember what I said yesterday night , I said we were celebrating a girls birthday and I was explaining about her ? 

Your not alone.

Why avoid than face it , when you face fear , you will get stronger .
But if you chosen avoid , no one can help .
I am there .

Hi , still my dearest girl.

Hello , shall we stop avoiding ? Shall we handle this as soon as possible , love will fade if this carries on . Just think of yourself , is it worth it for yourself ? What do you really want ? There is no perfect in relationship , but there is relationship that gone through alot and still holding . Where are the promises we kept ? To me , I still want to hold on because I believe theres trust from both , love from both , we just lack the fighting spirit to carry this on . Come on baby girl , if you still have the same mindset , lets trust and move on . The more we go through , the more stronger we get.

TRUST
I TRUST YOU , doubt is the opposite of trust , I didnt doubt you at all , the problem isn't about trust cause trust is there ! Trust me that I trust you , stop listening to something that doesnt exist .

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

TO MY MOST PRECIOUS GIRL.

Heyy , my dear girl . I know , what I said something seems weird , you were my second relationship , to be honest , I never thought I would take in anymore relationship , I have promised myself to be single till after I broke up with my ex. The reason I ask you not to trust people easily was because I was so worried for you ,
because , we only knew two days you almost told me all the stuff , I am afraid someone else would hurt you . I dont want you to be hurt of course . And just now I wanted to text you because I super miss you , its because I am not allow to use phone but despite the punishment I just wanna text you and that mistakes me sending you the wrong thing , I wanted to type like why so sweet , and I never wanted you to be sweet with anyone else but me , but if you do , I have no choice , all I could do is to love you alright ? and sometimes I often text wrongly , the text would often be off from what I am trying express . For the teacher , she was my lifeskill teacher , the previous relationship , she helped me by giving advices from my previous relationship . therefore , if she knew about I having a new relationship , she would text me everyday and doubt me with moving on . but , I want you to know , I am not afraid to tell the whole world that your my girlf . its because I
love you . I really fallen deeply in love with you . I want you to be my wife . I want you to be my everything . I did everything I could to help this relationship , I check about the stages of love from my teacher so that I could make this relationship perfect , the worse nightmare is your frown , I am really serious about this relationship , I have never thought of playing with your feeling , trust will be build by time , not status . babygirl , promise not to even have a single lie anymore okay ? I know that your upset . to be honest I didnt want you to know that from the moment you reply with only a word , my heart aches , my mood totally change , but I told myself not to even give up , I trust you . my heart was pain all the way back home .

SORRY

Hello people ! I am so sorry that I didn't update my blog ! But .. recently was awesome for me ! So happy with the days ^^ Sorry God , I didn't spend much time with you ! I promise I will okay ? HAHA ^^

♥GOD
♥SCHOOL
♥FRIENDS
♥TAEKWONDO
♥COOKING
♥PHONE 
♥LECTURERS 

14th August

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhT2HhEllpw&feature=player_embedded#!
This is Pyramid ! Super super interesting song ! ^.^

HAHA . LATE AGAIN FOR LIFESKILL's period ! Choing project arhh !
Had lunch at Blue Topaz <3 ! THE RIB LOIN NOT BAD SIAAA , so tender !
Lazy take photo and post :x forgive me !
WAHAHA ! Had theory lesson instead of demo for SOUTH EAST ASIA CUISINE TODAY !

NEXT UP was like TAEKWONDO ! <3 FAVOURITE . Cause its two weeks since I do sports !
IT WAS LIKE SO FUN LA ! WE HAD SPARRING ! Keep asking for teachings from seniors !
Then was selected for intensive training ! Sir say its really tough ! KEEP GOING FORWARD , DONT STOP EVEN WHEN YOU HAVE ENOUGH ! HAHA ^^ GOD , YOUR ALWAYS THERE <3
RIGHT LEG SHIN TOTALLY BLUE BLACK AND LEFT HAND TOTALLY BLUE BLACK TOO ^^
LOL IT WILL BE STRONGER ! LOVE TODAY's CCA XD

-yaosiang

13th August 2012

Haha ! Today , Saw a group of pigeon ... ? Out of them only one of them was brown . They are all at the road near my house . Then a car drive pass , all flew away , expect the brown one .. I wonder if it could fly or not .. I didnt care as it avoided the car and went nearer to the pathway . As I appoach nearer to my block , i heard a sound , something been squash .. its the bird , the brown bird which couldnt fly .. fuck ... i went back , its dead ... have to left it as the body is with blood .. I pray ...

Suddenly , I missed you haha ! So sudden laaa , haha so happy with you last time ! Now come to think of it . ! It really was happy memories :) just that I didnt manage it well . if not I believe it would last forever .

SCHOOL , HOME , KHATIB (BBALL) , HOME <3

-yaosiang

11th August 2012

What is the point when people are worried yet your not saving yourself and your telling people not to worried ?

If you say I slack or whatever fuck it fine , you say I work just to play around ? Fuck you , you think I nothing better to do ? Use some brains la .

Taught drill today ^^ , they are improving ! WOOO ! Hahaaaa , that Ruiyao omg -.- bo tuah bo suayy , anyhow chup in . Sec2 in our sec sch somemore LOL .... The smiles that makes me smileee , GOD , I am getting further and further from yaaa , I dont no how to reach you , please help meee . Worked at night ! omg , all the chef keep look at chiobu customer oneee , cant take it LOL .

10th August 2012

Ha ... Suddenly felt so tired of life ? I ain't giving up .. The road to being the chef isn't any near . I am still gonna do my parents proud . I am so sorry , I have to give up , I am not in the situation of having a relationship . Woke up 2Omins after alarm :x guess I am too tired . Ended school early today ! Cause have to go for my appointment ... haha ended at about 2pm ? Then meet Jeffrey and Johnathan for first meal ! LUNCH ! MACDONALD at J8 ! HAHA Super funny , we ordered icecream this way , 'AUNTIE , one tuesdae and one fridae , auntie said ' have have ! hot fudge arh ?' then we said ' ya ! hot fudge tuedae and fridae ! then auntie replied 'okay okay ' then stare us for like 2Osecs before she do the sundaes LOL .. ! 

Then we met Jerry , Reno , Kenneth , Brandon and JinHong ! Went to Hood Rd play Bowling , all the way watch them play ! Cause my hand injured ... went home , the scene i wouldnt like to see again , parent quarreling because of sister .. haha . great . 

-yaosiang

8th August 2012

Hello ! Been so long since I rested ! I guess tonight finally can sleep well ! Cause tomorrow no school ! NATIONAL DAY ^^ Went to school just to report ! LOL , then can go off already ! CA AWESOME MAX ! :D After school met my secondary awesome friends ! Then plan to have badminton at night ! Went home :x THEN PLAY DOTA LOL , then late for badminton .. noticed i can't do much with my left hand .. :(
Just hope my hand recovers asap :( and I can do whatever I want le .. :(
-yaosiang

6th August 2012

SCHOOL TODAY :D

Had only 5hours of sleep :/ SO TIRED :@

Tried my best in school !? Had Lifeskills for first lesson ! 

Did presentation , went very unprepared . Try my best to defend the whole group's point .

Food Culture next ! ALL THEORY , boring ! But at least there is video ? ^^ GORDON RAMSAY ! ZAI.

Learn about how people cook even BC 7000 ! HAHA . Cool right ? Well done guys , just by greeting the teacher that walked into the class ! 

After that had LUNCH at RESTAURANT <3 MASH POTATO RICE AND CHEESE ! OMG FAVOURITE ^^ 

Hope Eugene is fine ! He vomited I think ? Will be praying for you till you back to SCHOOL ! 

Finally we pass down from responsibilities to our class peepo . I hope they really could take care of it . 

And make it through attachment . That is all I wish . 

Thats all for today ! ADIYOS 

-yaosiang

5th August 2012

HELLO , CONTENTS FOR THE DAY !
- SERVICE 3 at 1PM
- WORK at 5:3OPM !
WOKE UP ! Still so fucking tired :( Been tired for 4 days already ! Thanks God for the strength you gave me ! Haha ! My faith still staying strong ! I still talks , worship ^^ . FINALLY ITS LIKE SO LONG I BEEN TO CHURCH ! FAITH ARISE ! On the service only 1 tear flow down HAHA :) Covered my eyes during service because I tired ! JEFFREY THOUGHT I WAS CRYING HAHA :P We both know how that feels ya ? Then went to my workplace , talk talk here , slack slack there before work :DD catching up with colleagues ! Everything went smooth at work ! <3 thanks to EMILY AND 4EVER ! They are always helping me ! >< Still so slow at closing bar ! Need to put in extra speed to it !

P.S
Haha ... Well , I am happy I could send you home ? Just that I really thinks that handling a relationship is hard for me , I still have problems with myself now . If I would find a girlf , she would be my wife , I dont want to have anymore other relationships cause I still believe in happy ever after . Just take care of yourself ! ^^

4th August 2012 !

Long hell day , but ended up with touch of heaven :D Saw this somewhere :x Woke up late ! Then was like super rush to meet Arvin , Ming Liang and Marcus , if I don't have to pack all my stuff for the rest of the day ! I WONT BE LATE HAHA . Need to meet at 7:45am but I met them at like 8:15am ? Then left 15mins to eat ! SO RUSH ! Cause of the Footdrill session we gonna conduct at First Toa Payoh PRIMARY ! They so cute la omg .. Don't even know how to teach them .. After that left , rush home bathe ! WA , whole day rushing ! Next up is TKD grading ! Met all my TKD mates at City Hall then go Simei ITE down together ! WAHAHA -WEILUN you very CHEKARHK ! AHHAAH . So fucking nervous during the grading then left early due to work later . CAB DOWN to work , omg -.- wasted so much money .. Work was like hell too ... but ... I AM CHAO REN ! Haha :P After work , switch on phone ... got the news ... I GOT DOUBLE PROMOTION WOOO ! LOL WAS LIKE JUMPING IN PUBLIC ! KISSED CAROL . LOLLLLLL ! WOOO ! LOLLL . SO OVERJOYED LOL SOOOOOO HAPPY ! WOOO ! HAHA ! SMALL THINGS THAT ALWAYS MAKE ME HAPPY ! Thats the heaven touch :P BYEEE .

-yaosiang

3rd August 2012.

Today was tiring !? Woke up at 5:5Oam ! Because of today's operation at school ! Serving 3Opax ! Raynor was late ... disappointed ... I don't no why ... Maybe he should know priorities .. Don't want to talk about it anymore .. Haha ! Help here help there ! Help everywhere , was so busy ... so busy covering up mistakes , prevent every possibility we could get fucked ... I respect Sir Wong , my classmate still don't understand him , a teacher , like a father . Once if he stopped caring , he won't even nag . I hope my classmate could understand that and appreciate what we are in now ... taking initiative , responsibility .. thats all the teacher wants .. I don't no how to lead anymore .. I need advice on this .. Just because I am the class rep doesnt means I am different from anyone else , I feel the same . Back to the day ! Bernard and Chiayu came to support haha ! For today menu was :
Appetizer : Tom Yum Soup !

Main Course : Fried Hokkien Mee !

Dessert : Almond Jelly :D

Look yummy right ? Haha ! Hope Bernard and Chiayu enjoyed ! Then had to go into second round of battle ! I won't define it as battle even though I used battle :P Its more of my playground because I love what I am doing now ! Sir Andrew inspired me ever since he was our Class Adviser . Hope one day I would achieve most of his character and the way he handle things , really respect him . Class ended like 6pm ? Anyway ! F&B disturb me when I was stock taking .. then I disturb back ! WAHAHA , they cannot handle my sweetness and gayness :P Super funny , then classmate all say I flirt :@ I got bullied and you guys say I flirt walao .. Judging again .. On way back I told Jingxuan as he was staring at two xiao mei mei all the way in MRT . Act as people were secretly looking at you , imagine your the girl ! Uncomfortable right ? Yeah , thats the same way I feel ... And thats the reason I dont look at people or stare .. Really tired , and doesn't really wanna share totally how I feel today , totally sucks , almost cried . Too stress with what I have now ..
-yaosiang

2nd August 2012

From today , everyday , I think this is one of the best way to improve my English and at the same time , I could write whatever I want to write , whatever that is in my heart ... Just by writing it helps .

Was stress up today , I was thinking about it the whole day . About been the class rep , about being the most responsible I could be . Yes , there is still Nisa , Huda , Nigel but I can't just put some part of the responsibility on them . I have to give everything I have . To cut off the stress I played DotA 2 . I found its always helps but .. it also takes most of my time . I won't define it as wasting time on DotA but ... I will quit DotA 2 soon . Maybe .. play once in awhile ?

I was with Raynor for lunch ! Mum bought me Nasi Lemak but I told her not to buy lunch for me .. She ended up buying Nasi Lemak from block 111 which is like very ice cold and without dishes :( Then play basketball with Raynor :x I still have my left hand ! And its still kicking man ! :P Had fun but didn't notice the time ... So ... my doctor's appointment was like 3:30pm and we ended basketball at 3:15pm LOL . Means I cannot go home bathe ! Haha ! So sorry to the doctor lahh , was like smell of sweat .. lucky not that much :P
She knows about I still going for training for TKD and played Pool , basketball ! Somehow she understand how tempting it can be without playing them for a month .

Went home after appointment ! Then think think think ... hais ... have to endure , waiting to get fucked by Sir Wong or Andrew again . I really gave everything I have . My class doesn't give fucks about the module ... How to make them understand ? I wonder ... I just hope God gives me the strength to pull it through .

Had dinner with all my brothers ! Jeffrey , Jerry , Johnathan , Marcus and Mingliang ! OMG , never forget the coaches ! One went into my pants LOL . So disgusting ! Had fun joy laughter . Then JEFFREY that retarded chase me like few rounds around the void deck ! OMG , just for that 1.3Odollar for the chicken wing ! There this words in chinese saying : 'Qiang qian shang gan qin' ! Both of us understand yet we still act like kids and pass the money around , ended up losing 3dollars .. ! STUPID JEFFREY ROAR . Having fierce fight tomorrow in the kitchen . Shall go sleep ! Nights :)

-yaosiang